I know it's been a while since I've posted, sorry. It's been kind of hectic. Here's a small taste:

I've mentioned before a very good friend of mine is battling cancer again. They're still putting everyone else first, so it's heartbreaking to see them getting IV drips because their immune system is down to about zero and they keep getting deathly sick, yet they still drive 2 hours each way to take a virtual stranger to run piddly errands. A stranger who no one has anyting nice to say about. Look, I'm selfish. I just want my friend to get better, but there's nothing I can do. Telling them to rest and put themselves first has fallen on deaf ears. They have a huge heart, except when it comes to their own health and wellbeing.

A couple of my friends are going through some issues, so I've been trying to be there for them as much as I can. It's my pleasure to do so, goodness knows they've been there for me!

A relationship gently, mutually, respectfully and very kindly came to an end.

A family crisis has happened. Luckily, everyone is healthy, but this has been big and involved meetings and phone calls. There are a lot of times when I wish I was smarter and more educated than I am, this has been one of those times. I don't have all the answers on a GOOD day, let alone about stuff like this. I'm doing the best I can with the tools I have, I guess.

I've been working a lot, but it's been good. In fact, I've been nominated by my bosses to attend an invitation-only work conference in Florida in June. I'm thrilled that my hard work and good work ethic are being recognized. That makes me feel good. I'm not sure when I'm supposed to find out if I'm going or not. I'm secretly hoping I'm not.....

The big drawback about the conference is, it's the week before I'm scheduled to have surgery. A four-hour surgery that my mom (and possibly my dad) is going to come to town for. Yikes. What I'm having surgery on isn't life-threatening or anything, so don't freak out. It's something that causes a lot of pain that I had taken care of a long time ago, but as all the old pains have come back, my doctors and, most surprisingly, my insurance have deemed it "medically necessary" again. Now, I fully expected to have to deal with the pain forever and get a big fat rejection letter from my insurance, as I had nine rejections before I had it approved last time, and I had WAY kinder and more understanding insurance back then, lol!!! When the approval letter arrived, I was in shock for a few days! I submitted it thinking "there's no way, but I might as well put in for it." I'm excited, but I'm also 100% sure I'll be freaking out the closer it gets. Four hours!

Now I have to make sure all my crap is in order before June....

That's some of what's been up the last little while.

I hope I caught all the typos, my IPad is old and the keyboard is acting up. My apologies if I didn't.

Happy Birthday CBLMW. This new year is going to be filled with amazing things for you!! With all your hard work and dedication to your craft, you deserve it. Anyway, as always, I wish you the best of all things and a life of joy, success and happiness.

I debated emailing you, but figured you had enough going on and didn’t need another thing in your in box.

Robin

Stayed late at work today, I'm so tired! I was up at 2am, so it's been a really long day. We're at a standstill with the remodel/construction, so I'm also navigating around boxes and artwork all day every day. My legs are bruised. It's like working inside a full storage unit.

I'm making my feeble attempt at cooking a nutritious dinner, as beat as I am. Fresh green beans, roasted rose potatoes and air fried chicken breast. Wish me luck that it's edible.

I think I'm going to block out all news outlets, fix a cocktail a binge watch something stupid until I can fall asleep. I've already showered and picked out my clothes for tomorrow, so most of my chores around the house are done. It's too late to get the big stuff done, but oh well.

All I need to do is wash pans and dishes before I get too comfortable.

I've been a bit more outspoken lately than I normally am. In certain situations. Sometimes, a lot of the time It's foolish, but I can't help it. I’m non-confrontational by nature, but it can be a bad thing sometimes.... and sometimes it can be a good thing, lol. If I act out, it’ BIG!

A few weeks ago, I was walking to my car in my old Miracle Mile neighborhood (a tax document was sent to my old apt by mistake) and saw a woman crying in the street, looking scared of her large, scary companion, begging the man to leave her alone and leave. I asked her directly if she was okay and the man told me to "mind your fucking business, nosey bitch". I didn't take well to that. I continued to talk to her to see if she needed help while he hurled abuse at me. At some point, I lost my shit and started giving it back to him. I don't know what got into me. I got into a yelling match with this big, scary guy (and I NEVER yell, ask anyone. When I get mad, I go quiet.). Then I called him the F-word, MF-word and the C-word. Repeatedy. (he called me the same things). It ended with me shouting, pointing at him, calling him names and letting him know I called the police and they were on the way and taking photos. I'm gonna get killed one of these days for my beliefs. I hope the woman is okay. I couldn't sleep that night thinking about it. The thing to remember is, had the asshole guy let the woman answer me herself and say "we're okay, thanks though", none of that would have happened! H was posturing and acting like an abuser. I know that behavior when I see it.

Then, today, I was talking to someone I know very well about a work situation and they started in on a hateful anti-Semitic rant. I shut them down immediately and told them it was disgusting and wrong and that I didn't want to listen to it anymore, the proceeded to walk away. They said things to me as I was leaving along the lines of me “not wanting to hear the truth". I replied, "what you're saying is not the truth, it's disgusting and wrong" and continued walking away. How can it be Los Angeles in 2019 and people are saying this bullshit? There could be big ramifications in my friendship with this person for me saying that, but what right is right. I felt sick about their horrendous views.

My liberal heart and values are going to get me killed one of these days. At least it will be for a good cause, right? RIGHT??!!!??

Work has been a bit hectic. We've got some remodeling going on and A LOT of folks that should know how to disconnect and connect their own computers, don't. I'm a woman, pushing 50, crawling over, under and beside desks to get people under 40 back up and running. ME??!!!?? Do they know how weird that is? We're a team though, so I'll help where I can. I have the bruises to prove it!!

We've hit some speed bumps with the remodel, but most are rolling with it. A couple aren't, but that's to be expected I guess. I just wish they would show a little grace.

Completely different note:

Everyone knows that Sunday afternoons are MY time, for me. I do a head to toe deep clean and relaxation routine to prepare for the week ahead that I've been doing for 20+ years. This past Sunday, it was nice enough to open the windows wide and let the fresh air in. I am so grateful for the fact that I am lucky enough to be sitting in a bubble bath, looking up through a window with blue sky, framed by palm trees with sunlight streaming through while listening to beautiful music. It was just about perfect.

There has been other stuff, but it's too boring to post. Maybe later. Maybe.

I am hopeful that the weather holds for a bit and doesn't get too hot or too cold! I really want to enjoy this. I feel sense of calm in the chaos with it and I know the weather has a lot to do with it...

In a world tgat’s gone topsy-turvy, I will take any teeny tiny bit of calm I can get my hands on.

Let's all do something to help someone else today. Big or small. Please? Wish someone a nice day, that's free! Let someone in front of you on the freeway (that's free too... and don't expect the wave) or hold the door for the person behind you. You could change someone's day.

Sorry if this is a weird post, things are odd right now. Good, but odd.

Sorry.

When is this dumb cold going to go away? It's a pain being sick!

So, I've a change or two in my personal life. Good changes (I hope).

I'm excited about this next chapter and the extra spare time! I think I'm going to take advantage of some of additional time and binge watch some of my old favorite tv shows without any guilt and maybe enjoy the nice weather.

Crap, Brody Stevens... such a tortured person who only wanted to make people laugh, help folks and be a positive person. I have an appointment tomorrow afternoon in my old neighborhood, I think I’m going to wear my Brody shirt and try to spread some positive energy in his memory. Rest easy Brody.